Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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