Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
