I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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