soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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