I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
