I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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