I CAN MOONWALK!
kristin has been a bad kristin
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
