Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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