i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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