Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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