i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
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