How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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