I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize