Capitaan dildo arrescate!
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize