I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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