found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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