her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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