We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
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Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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