Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
