So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Randomize
