So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
