i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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