Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
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Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
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eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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