oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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