I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
