so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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