Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Say something about gay babies.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize