Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Floor bacon is actually really good
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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