i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize