is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
