Reggie can tackle my bush.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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