her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
