They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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