The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose