ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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