he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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