I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Still dying that you shit outside
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
