is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
