I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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