You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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