u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
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watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
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Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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