Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
