it was like his penis was on wheels.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words...techno handjob
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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