Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.