It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
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