How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
