the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
