shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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