they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
we're so committed to being not committed
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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