I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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