Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
