i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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