3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Randomize
